One Liner Insults

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I can see your point,
but I still think you're full of crap.

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I like you,
you remind me of when I was young and stupid.

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You are validating
my inherent mistrust of strangers.

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Everyone has the right to be stupid
but you're just abusing the privilege

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I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

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It sounds like English,
but I can't understand a word you're saying.

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Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?

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I will always cherish
the initial misconceptions I had about you.

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The fact that no one understands you
doesn't mean you're an artist.

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Any connection between your reality and mine
is purely coincidental.

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I'm not being rude, you're just insignificant.

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I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

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Are you always this stupid
or are you just making a special effort today?

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Were your parents cousins?

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You have more faces than Mount Rushmore

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The world's first living brain donor

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He is so old that his blood type was discontinued

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He's just visiting this planet

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He would be out of his depth in a puddle.

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Don't let you mind wander
- it's far too small to be let out on its own

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He's so dense that light bends around him.

<<>>

How did he get here?
Did someone leave his cage open?

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I can't talk to you right now;
tell me, where will you be in ten years?

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I don't know what your problem is,
but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

<<>>

I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

<<>>

Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

<<>>

Everyone in this room is now
a little bit poorer for having heard your opinion.

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Does Justin Bieber know
you've raided his wardrobe?

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I know you're not as stupid as you look.
You couldn't be!

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You're so old you drove a chariot to school.

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You should do some soul-searching.
Maybe you'll find one.

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You remind me of the ocean - you make me sick.

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He's as strong as an ox and almost as intelligent

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When God rained down intelligence on the Earth, you were holding an umbrella.

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She's got a body that won't quit
and a brain that won't start.

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Perhaps your whole purpose in life
is simply to serve as a warning to others.

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Keep talking. I always yawn when I'm interested.

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Nice perfume.
Did you bathe in it before coming out?

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If I throw a stick, will you leave?

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When I want your opinion I'll beat it out of you.

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I don't think you are an idiot, but what's MY opinion against thousands of others?

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I'll never forget the first time we met
- although I'll keep trying.

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I'm busy now.
Can I ignore you some other time?

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If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.

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Thank you for reading our collection of one liner insults. Yes, I know some of them are more than one line
- but they are short lines!